16 Things I’ve Learned In My Relationship-first Year

No relationship is perfect and perfect relationships aren't real. We don't aim for perfection anyway, perfection can't be loved, it can merely be admired, we love the special and one's imperfections is what makes him perfect. We love the imperfect perfectly.

Here are some lessons I've learned through the hard and good times I've been through with my partner: 

1- It’s a necessity to express yourself, but this would never mean to hurt others’ feelings, especially someone who loves you, even if you speak the truth. So if it hurts, keep it to yourself.

2- You need to respect then to accept your partner for the way he is and the life he lives, even if you hate things about him or about the way he lives, that would never mean that you have the right to ask him to change himself or even to judge him. So accept him or just leave!

3- If you want your relationship to last you need to do what you've done at its beginning. We tend to get comfortable and take the ones we love for granted, it's good to be comfortable, but not that you cease paying attention and making efforts anymore, or like you used to at the beginning of your relationship.

4- You should never expect your partner's love in some specific way because everyone has his own way to express his love. Give up saying « if he loves me he would … » and start enjoying his love as he likes to express it. 

5- You effect each other a lot, in a hard time when you stand by him and show your support that would mean much to him and when you just don’t care it disappoints a lot. Smal deeds can mean much more than whether it can change things or not. 

6- What makes the love even stronger is this loving back, when the one you love and care about is loving you back, you'll want to love them even harder.

7- It’s OK to let your partner live his life, he’s not supposed to spend every single hour with you and being too busy for you would never mean that you have no place in his hearts or that you're of no importance to him. W
e want to feel important, too important to be ignored or cheated on, you see it's all about us, about our precious gem.

8- Love isn't about claiming someone for ourselves, you'll be then loving yourself only. When you truly love someone, it won't matter to you whether he was spending a good time with his friends more than with you, what will matter is that he's happy, and that is enough for you.

9- No one is perfect, and you’re not s
upposed to meet that perfect one, you’re supposed to see his qualities and his flaws and then decide if it's worth it to stay with him now that you see the whole picture.

10- Your partner needs to know that you’re happy to have him in your life, that you’re proud of him, that you see him beautiful, smart, just perfect in his own way! and he needs to hear it from you, « I love you » can not replace any of these, each word has its meaning. Don't be afraid to express your love, it's not a shame to do so, but it's a shame to think that doing it is something stupid or unnecessary. He's not going to read your mind if you think that he should, so why to deny yourselves the affection!

11- Relationship is the only place where arguments won’t help, you don’t need to fix anything, you just have to maintain it.

12- I’ve learned that you can do nothing to make him love you, all that you can do is to be yourself. Don't try to impress, just be you, then if he didn't love you, it's not because you're not worth it or anything personal, it's about him, he couldn't love you that's all. Someone else out there will love you endlessly, so don't deny yourself true love.

14- You shouldn't envy other couples for the relationship they have, comparing is never fair. You're just seeing what others want you to see, they're posting their best moments pictures on social media, they're not telling you about the thousands argument they're having or the problems they're facing while being together. 

15- Getting back to your loved ones and make it up has nothing to do with ego and pride, it's a matter of attitude. It's whether you want them and you need them or you don't. If you want to talk to them, then do it, don't wait for them to make the first step! it's stupid to lose someone you love because of your ego. 

16- It's a great thing to give a second chance each time, that means that your love is worth to work on it and that it's important for you, but you should also consider that your partner won't change no matter how much promises he'll make and no matter how much you'll try to change and fit in. Don't raise your hopes high and know when enough is enough.

A relationship can only work between two people who are totally present and dedicated to one another, despite any outward distractions or internal problems, you're either in it together, or you're not in it at all.

Get my free e-book: The ultimate cheat sheet on lessons

You Might Also Like

0 commentaires