7 Top Things You Have To Consider Before Getting Married







When it comes to marriage, a lifetime commitment, love alone wouldn't be enough, there's so much to consider before taking the decision to share your life with one person, one right person.

Below are some things you got to consider and to agree on when taking the decision to marry someone apart from love:





1- Sharing interests:

While everyone is unique and has his full right to be so, you need to have some interests in common with your partner. Otherwise, there would be a gap between the two of you growing up each day a little wider, because when being totally different, having different habits and preferring to do different things, you'll end up spending time apart often. Like when one prefers camping and nature while the other wants to go to some hotel or resort. You might end up having separate vacations.


You'll always have your differences, we don't aim to be a copy of the other one, but we aim to compromise and meet each other halfway. You can always enjoy the things you have in common but if you don't have anything in common, you'll spend your whole time compromising and there will be no more time left to enjoy each other.




2- Religion:


When being different you got to respect, if not accept, each other's beliefs. But if you're religious and you practice your religion, religion might be a problem if your partner has a different religion or has no religion at all. I didn't believe in this until I experienced it first-hand, it wasn't a marriage though. I was religious and he didn't believe in god, the deal was to respect each other, but then while I had things 
forbidden by my religion I couldn't, for the good, he had no limits. I thought then that a man with no religion, is a man with no principles. When you believe that ain't no God to judge you, that no one is going to judge you, you eventually will do what you want, good and bad would be the same for you seeing that ain't no consequences for it. Well maybe some laws are settled to be the judge, but when no one is watching, what would hold you from doing harm to yourself and to others! Also, he always would be thinking of how silly for me to believe in God and he would try to change my beliefs each time the subject is brought up, which in case you practice your religion, would be brought up often. You see, even if your partner didn't say anything about it, he would always have his thoughts about it.




3- Money:


While money can't buy you happiness, it might make you miserable when you both can't agree on it. This includes first your life plans, how is it the life you want to live? how big your house would be, or is it just an apartment, until you need something bigger? Will you both need cars? How do you want to spend your money? If you're a luxury lover then you might want to discuss this matter sooner because money after all, is a need.





4- Your dreams:


It's important for you both to fulfill your dreams, even though sometimes one will end up compromising for the other, you got to discuss those dreams. Like if you love traveling or your career requires for you to be far away sometimes, you need to find something in between so that you won't have to give up on your dreams and it won't do any harm for your relationship either. A marriage shouldn't be an obstacle in front of your dreams, at the opposite it should motivate you to accomplish even more.





5- Past, Present, Future:


We don't judge anyone, we respect people the way they are, but when it comes to marriage and sharing a lifetime, you may want to consider his past, present and mostly make sure that your future plans meet. His past and background can affect your relationship, the habits, the manners, I know that people can change, but not quite that much, not the way you think and you can't expect your partner to change at the first place. Even after 20 years from now, you'll still look at your partner and feel like he's the same person you knew 20 years back. We don't change overnight, we might improve though. So don't hold onto the thought that he will change and things will get better. You just accept that person the way he is now.





6- Anger and stress responses:


Anger and stress is inevitable. While we don't aim to never feel any of it, we aim to learn how to manage it and respond better to it each time. But some people tend to act aggressively when they get angry or they stress about something, this aggressiveness might turn to physical abuse. That, you need to take in consideration, you don't want to find yourself abused in your marriage some day, and he who threats to beat you, will actually do, and he who beats once, will beat you tenth. He who is abusive won't change unless he receives help from experts. So do not fool yourself.





7- Your views on household duties:


You'll share everything, you both can be working, so naturally, you two will have to share house chores. Sometimes, some guys don't accept this, but also some women think that this is a woman's duty and they want to do it by themselves, either way, you'll have to discuss your preferences. Now this might be among the details, but you see some break up because of those tiny details. It can sometimes be too irritating that it leaves you stressing all the time, it feels like fighting for "the same old shit". And small fights can hide bigger problems




Love can blind us sometimes. It's hard to hear an advise when you're too drowned in your own fantasies.

The goal from this isn't to pick up a perfect partner, far from it, you just want someone who's right for you, someone perfectly imperfect. Perfection can't be loved, it's the imperfection we love, the more imperfect your partner is, the more you'll feel closer to him, more able to complete him where he needs you.







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