We want to have faithful partners, for the simple reason is that we need to feel our value, we need to feel like we're so important and that we can't be cheated on! And so getting jealous means to be afraid that your partner would choose someone else on you. it's just that desire of being desired, while we're supposed to feel our value without others' approval!
Having a boyfriend who has many friends especially girls ones used to bother me a lot, that I broke up with him because I couldn't handle that feeling of jealousy anymore, it drives me crazy as it does for many of us and it makes me do stupid things. The solution is about both, knowing your worth and trusting your partner:
1- Know your value:
When you're jealous, you feel less confidence, you start to doubt yourself, probably thinking that you're not good enough, and might as well getting scared how you'll end up if you ever lost that person, you may think that you won't be able to make it alone and that you need him so bad in your life. What hurts the most about jealousy, is to feel insecure, to know that he may go away or choose another girl over you, be happy with someone else, likes someone else and thinks that you're not good enough that he had to look outside, not feeling that you're important to him and feeling disrespected since he didn't care about your feelings and cheated on you...
Nothing feels better than your partner telling you that the other girls have nothing on you! Knowing that you're wanted by the person you love most, that's a huge confidence-booster.
Well, at the beginning my partner's love made me feel really confident, the special way of treatment he gave me in front of other and any act of love he may show, used to calm down my insecurities for a bit, then I found out how special I was and how I did worth it with just being me, and so you're good enough, if someone didn't find you good, then it's his problem, not yours, don't even care!! give up jealousy that might be easy to be said, but you won't do it until you understand that you're good enough! know that no one is better than anyone, they might be better than you in some things, but that would never make them better than you, you also have special things to be better in, you're unique!
Finally with knowing that I'm strong enough, even if he won't be there by my side, even if he'll choose someone else on me, I know that I can make it, I don't need him! I don't need his approval. What is going to hurt me, will make me stronger and that's what matters most.
2- Trust Your Partner:
Easy said than done, you won't be able to fully trust him unless you put yourself in his shoe, it might not be the exact way of feeling due to the difference as being a man and woman, but it still can be the same, when you love someone and you're a woman you'll see the other guys the same, nothing more like brothers, or you might not be so in love with your partner, and so the same thing goes for him.
Men love to have their own life, more than most women, to hang out with people, and they rarely stick on with their women, but that's okay, because if they really love you, no woman can take your place.
You may feel jealous because you're so protective over him, you don't want him to be taken from you! but you need to be convinced that being together doesn't mean to own him, he still have his own life and everyone is free to do whatever he wants, you can't control him.
When the love is strong enough ain't no temptations or problems able to affect it, so you shouldn't worry about this.
In the other hand
Cheating can happen when you're not enough for your partner, when you're not taking your full responsibility toward him, there he'll look outside for what he's missing, sometimes you can't only blame him! You need to understand your partner more and you need to understand his needs! We all want a caring and a loving partner, but would we make sure first that we're showing the love and care enough?
When you don't live up to your responsibility as a partner, you may drive your partner into the arms of another person, there you can't blame them for cheating on you, you should be blaming yourself because it was partly your fault, if you appreciated your partner, he wouldn't have sought attention outside of you.
Sometimes people cheat, not because they found someone who is better than you, but just because they found themselves alone when they most needed you and wanted someone to hold them!
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